Think about what you wanted to accomplish last week. Did you? What are the things that hold you back from doing everything you’d like to do?
Last week I wanted to prove (to myself) I was competent at showing up to work on time and icing a cake. Sounds easy perhaps but I’ve had two major obstacles this week; age and weather.
Age, mostly! I could probably deal with the weather better if I was younger. I would really like to make the money full-time would give me but I just can’t work that long anymore. I get tired and my brain starts to turn off. It reverts to childhood; sits down and says, ‘I don’t want to do this anymore and you can’t make me’
Then there’s the Polar Vortex to deal with. In yesterday’s post I wrote about the scary drive to work and what it takes to just get dressed for this weather. I own a house so the shovelling is all mine, too. Yesterday I had the day off so I shoveled my driveway which is two properties long as I live behind someone who doesn’t shovel or have to go out to work. This morning I had to take out my recycling box at the crack of dawn as the garbage truck comes very early Monday mornings. The windchill was -26, (yes, really) so I put on my ski pants, fleece jacket under my winter coat, hat under the hood, snow boots and insulated gloves and trudged out to the road with my blue box. (one thing I Iove about this weather is the squeaking snow) The winds last night have blown drifts into where I shovelled yesterday.
I have a wood stove so there is wood to bring in everyday or two. It’s worth the work. I have a propane furnace, also, but it would cost a fortune and I would still be cold if I didn’t have my wood stove. Besides, I love the wood heat thing. I like getting it and stacking it.
My shifts are 5 hours long, three days a week and that’s all I can handle. I only get a 15 minute break which is OK because the lunch room is cold. After 5 hours I’m tired and a fog starts setting into my brain.
Today I’m in from 1:00 to 6:00. I’m worried because I tend to fall asleep around 3:30. I had planned on relaxing this morning, having an early lunch, then coffee and sweets at 3:00 that will take me to 6:00. But I’ve got shovelling to do again and need to bring in enough wood to last until tomorrow. In usual winter weather the wood stove would keep the furnace from coming on all day but in this weather I come home to the furnace holding at 18 degrees. I turn the thermostat to 22, turn on the infrared space heater in the kitchen, bathroom electric heater and stoke up the fire. I change into my dirty work winter wear, feed the birds (outside) and bring in more wood if needed.
Then there is the ‘icing the cake’ incident. I worked with my new cake boss who is a young man. He was showing me how to ice the large birthday cakes and was getting frustrated I wasn’t doing it well and fast enough. It was my first time and I’m sure I wasn’t that bad so when he said “here; you should be doing it this fast…… [slap, slap, slap, he’s done]” I felt somewhat incompetent but it was my first time for Pete’s sake! I’m sure I’ll get better.
This week I’m only scheduled for two days and I am glad! This winter is a huge barrier and at my age it’s a lot of extra work. Enough is enough already!