“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” Maya Angelou
This quote popped into my head immediately. When someone has shown you, time and time again, who they really are then don’t expect them to be suddenly different. Don’t be surprised and disappointed at their behavior: count on it.
My ex husband is a good example to explain what I mean. For years I hoped he would suddenly change and we could live the life I had imagined. Yep, there it is. what I imagined. And I did this for years; imagine what our life could be like if he only was a nice person. Its taken a long time but I have learned to accept that this is who he is and that is what he wants. The person I imagined retiring happily ever after with was someone made up in my own head. He has shown me time and time again who he is.
And I have come to accept that. I’m just using him as an example. We have expectations of people but then we are disappointed when they don’t act they way we want. I’m learning not to have expectations from people but accept who they are. Know that this is what they are like and count on it to continue. Stop wishing they would be different.
Over the years I’ve gained a lot of self-respect for what I’ve been through and how it all turned out. The mental health program I volunteer for (and belong to) has also really helped with my self esteem. Now that I have self-respect I can no longer tolerate being treated disrespectfully.
I am learning to examine my expectations and hopefully dropping them completely. Don’t expect someone to suddenly change into something we want them to be. Know what to expect and count on it.
Your prompt for #JusJoJan the 21st and Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “count on it.” Use the phrase “count on it” somewhere in your post.